Yes folks, your's truely got his hands on GTA4 yesterday and I didn't even pre-order it!

 

I started playing it last night, only messing around, I want more time to be able to get into it properly.  What I can tell you this, it is astonishing!

 

What a game!  The whole thing just oozes quality.  From the physics to the graphics, from the sound to the gameplay!  WOW, basically.

 

I ended up getting the PS3 version and know somebody who has the 360 version so will borrow that when they have finished it.  It does have some slowdown, but I haven't really noticed it whilst playing, and, to be completely blunt, can understand considering what is going on on-screen.

 

Still, it hasn't done anything to detract from the game.

 

Oh, as usual, the game has a thumping soundtrack with all sorts of tastes catered for, which is brilliant!

 

 

Oddest moment in the game up to now for me?  Driving around, decided I didn't want to go that way so did a handbrake turn, accelerated heavily only for a pedestrian to walk infront of the car.  The car hit the pedestrian and with him still attached to the front of the car rammed straight into a police car!  Well, made a quick getaway leaving a trail of destruction in my wake to try to slow the police down.

 

You really do have complete freedom to do what you please!  Just don't stay around too long otherwise the police will come after you!

 

For instance, here I am in a diner, minding my own business getting some food to increase my health, when I decide it would be a good idea to beat the customers up.  Well I start, but spent a little bit too much time and all of sudden the police were all over me like a rash, blocking both exits!

Well, my character was a gonna.

 

I will give a more indepth review once I have got into it a lot more.  I cannot do it justice right now.

Well, folks, it's almost here.  It's almost upon us just like the car travelling too fast on the proverbial pavement that is called Life.  GTA4 (Grand Theft Auto to those who don't know, and why/how not?) is released Midnight tonight (28th April) and I cannot wait!

 

Whats the fascination behind this game?  I here some of you ask.  Well, let's just say it pretty well lets you do whatever you like.

 

It's freedom is what set's it apart, but also how well it implements the whole thing.  Lets just hope that this episode does not damage it's reputation, although by all accounts it should not, with most mags reviewing it giving it well into the high 90%.  WOW

 

I will leave it at that for now and give you a more indepth view once I have bought the game.

I have to say, I  have been putting this off and off, but no longer!  I have to vent my spleen at the scurge of anything to do with TV.  I was in a bit of a quandary as to whether to list this under TV, entertainment or create two new catergories, "TV" or "Entertainment" with said quotes!

 

Lets start by saying a few things, what sort of TV could give us the likes of Jade Goody?  Will Young?

 

And who in the hell, and in the right state of mind, would give Simon Cowell a job?  Himself, yes, well he would, and he has made a packet from it as well!

 

Having said that, Simon Cowell was involved in probably one of the best moments in reality/talent TV, when some bloke threw water over him!  Well, at least I cracked a smile at that one!

 

Oooh, here it is: YouTube Simon Gets Watered Linky Doodle Doo

 

Don't get me wrong, some reality TV shows are quite good, I was particularly impressed with the one that gave us Girls Aloud (for obvious reasons, like they are talented, honest, I think they are.  No seriously, I do, honest, I have no interest in the videos whatsoever, honest!  If I say it often enough, I may just believe it myself!).

 

Going onto what possibly caused the beginning of my hatred for Reality TV, Big Brother!.  Now, don't get me wrong, I liked Big Brother in the first series, I might have even liked the second series and very (unlikely) possibly the third, but then it went down hill.  You see, not satisfied with locking people (who either want to go sh*g silly or kill the rest, never a happy medium) away in a house, they decided to pick some seriously odd people to go in to "mix it up" a bit.  Then, they also decided, "Hmmm, what depraved and humiliating thing can we do to someone today?"

 

Over the years, the stunts pulled by Big Brother in the ever increasingly competitive World of ratings have got more depraved and humiliating, the mix of personalities of people being entered getting to such a point that at sometime there is bound to be some sort of mass brawl.  And it probably won't involve bikini's, mud and wrestling, unfortunately

 

What gets me is the amount of people who are willing to put themselves through that humiliation, but then again, thats what the promise/potential of earning big bucks does to you!  And yes, I have thought about it myself!  LOL.

 

There are the odd reality TV type shows I do like, for instance, Strictly Come Dancing.  Now, don't ask me why, as the format is relatively the same as the likes of (OMG, I am going to have to mention it by name, please someone marry me off to Sally or Leah of Home & Away so I can avoid this..... too late) Pop Idol!  (ARRGH!)

 

Yes, that show that was spawned in the fiery pits of hell, probably around the same time as Janine from EastEnders.  At least she was only back for a few episodes, unfortunately, just like night comes after day, you just know that Pop Idol or something of that ilk is only around the corner!

 

How come are they so successful?  Is it because we all have this nasty, sado-masochistic streak?  We enjoy watching others make idiots of themselves?  Yes, I do just as much as anyone, doesn't mean I enjoy all these though.

 

Now, lets see what we get if we google Reality TV shows, ooh, this website:

 

 

Lets take a brief look at a few of these, shall we?  Hmmmm, whats ripe for a good beating.......

 

Oh, here we go:

 

Be proud and confess! New ITV documentary - Or, in other words, lets make some already miserable people even more miserable by destroying there lives by making them confess to things that they wouldn't normally confess to!  I mean, come on why do they do this?  It is a shot in the dark that it will be successful.

 

Calling all Hot Daughters & Hot Mums! - WHAT!?!?  Sounds like something dodgy to me!  I am sure thats illegal, oh but hang on just a minute lets read what it says.... CALLING ALL HOT DAUGHTERS AND MUMS! Cheetah Television is working on a series about mother-daughter relationships – Do you go for the same clothes as each other? The same men? - The same men?  What?  Are they taking the p*ss completely?  Now I am trying to keep this clean folks, but that brings up images I would rather not have!

 

Calling all Mothers & Daughters Who Fight - Well okay, this sounds a bit more respectable, this sounds like something going along the lines of maybe we can help them out, until you read what it says about it.... when it doesn't mention that at all.

 

Weddings - Are You Getting Married? - No, I am just having a wedding for the fun of it! LOL  What a stupid question!

 

Finding it hard to let go after a break up? - You are kidding?  This may as well just say, "Hey, we want to make money from your misery!"  Blimey!  I think I would rather watch a documentary on the lives and loves, and of course impending deaths, in Sally and Leahs marriages from Home & Away.  At least that misery is made up!

 

I realise that they won't be called these, but you never know.

 

You know, at this point, I really must stop!  I am laughing so hard, I am not just crying but almost pi**ing myself!  I just cannot believe some of the quality of some of the TV we get.

 

At some point I really should mention that instead of watching some of the above mentioned shows, I would rather spend an entire day tied to a chair in the same room as Janine from Eastenders whilst having someone continually stab me in the eyes with a spoon!

 

I would like to go into further detail about past reality TV shows, but fear that by the time I have finished I would have died of old age and Mars would have a colony (2005 saw over 200 reality TV programmes alone!).  I may, if it's possible, do that later, thought I would do a shortened one for now, just to vent some of my spleen!

 

Don't get me wrong, I do like quite a few reality TV programmes, but, and it is a big but, some of these really to scrape the bottom of the barrel and come out with some absolute tripe!  A bit like my blogs!

 

Soon peeps.

Okay, I put it under Site Improvements which considering what I have done is a contradiction in terms.

 

You see, I have now put my photo on here (this is where everybody runs away screaming) for my profile.  Now I am not exactly the most photogenic person in the World, but I will be looking for a better picture of myself!  That you can believe.

 

The one I have uploaded is more Elephant Man than Orlando Bloom/Tom Cruise (although only before he become a head case)/George Clooney/Christian Bale/fit in your desired celeb.

 

Just thought I would produce the biggest laugh this blog has ever got!

 

Later peeps, hopefully with a better pic!  (And whats with the shiney forehead and what looks like a scar down the right-hand side of my nose (I do not have any scars)!?!?!?  I blame the phone completely!)

I have decided to let the geek inside of me come out to play for once.

 

Last Friday I bought myself Lego Star Wars - The Complete Saga on PS3.  And WOW, what a game.  How can I put this?  As a Star Wars arcadey type game, it must be the Jessica Lucas of all Star Wars arcade games. Geek-Dar Level 1

 

(For those KOTOR fans (Knights Of The Old Republic), I will say this only once, KOTOR is not an arcade game, it is an RPG!)  Right, where was I?  Oh, dear that makes the jump straight to Geek-Dar Level 4 the geek that I am.

 

The game is brilliant, lots of fun.  You get to play through the whole six films in a story type manner.  Once a whole "film" is finished in story mode, it then unlocks a free roam type mode.  This allows you to go back and explore more, but using different characters!

For instance, in Episode 1, instead of playing Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon Jinn, you could be (if you unlock them), C-3PO and Darth Maul.  Believe it or not, you need to do this actually. There are points during the levels where the standard characters cannot do things, for instance certain objects can only be manipulated by using the Dark Side of the Force.  Also, you need to do this to get other unlockables within that level!  The game has this in-built re-playability straight away.  With the added bonus of being extremely good!

 

Yes, thats right, you can go around as Darth Maul with his double headed lightsaber!  How cool is that!?!?!?  (Okay young man, thats up to Geek-Dar Level 5 for the getting excited about being able to go around as Darth Maul.  And!  Up to Geek-Dar Level 7 for thinking its really cool!  You see?  You see what is happening?  I am now talking to myself from a third person persepective, maybe my mates are right, maybe I do need help.)

 

Speaking of third person perspective, this game is played from that position, and work it does.  (Right! Geek-Dar Level 8 for the spurious Yoda-like comment!  Do you think if I mentioned Jessica Lucas a few times my geek-dar level could go down a bit?  NO!  Damn!)

 

There are so many unlockables its amazing, I have only completed the first two episodes, and got a fair few unlockables, but there are piles and piles more.  I cannot wait to get back to playing it!  Brilliant, really brilliant!  (You sad, sad git, Geek-Dar Level 10 has now been reached)

 

The whole game just oozes quality.  A bit like a certain actress who shall remain nameless!  LOL

 

This game gets 10/10 for me!

 

Well, folks, today I am happy.  I have managed to secure a ticket to go and see Duran Duran at the Summer Pops in Liverpool this year, the venue is the Liverpool Echo Arena.  I went to see them ages ago (2005 in Birmingham right after Liverpool won the Champions League, and yes, I wore my Liverpool top, got a few cheers as well and well dones etc) and they were brilliant.

 

Very, very good live, well worth watching.  Can't wait, should be good!

 

As a side note, at the time of going to see Duran Duran at Birmingham, I really did not like Daniel Bedingfield!  However, he was supporting them on this night and at first it was like "Oh God, please, no!"

 

Well, was I surprised, the guy was really good!  I was shocked!  And you know, I can now listen to his music!  Odd, really, but there you go!

 

The time before that, went to see them at the MEN and supporting them that time was Goldfrapp, and they were excellent to.

 

Wonder if they will have, and whom, a supporting act this time?

As I said in todays gym blog, and for those who don't realise, today is Monday.  I have not blogged all over the weekend because I was taking time out to reflect exactly what was happening at our wonderful football club.

 

I mean, just lately, the drama that is occuring at Liverpool FC at the moment is worthy of a plot by JJ Abrams, it really is getting that silly.

 

For those who do not know, very early last year Liverpool FC was owned by David Moores.  Now, even though Mr Moores is rich, he quite obviously isn't rich enough to help make us compete financially with the likes of Chelsea and Manchester United.

 

We needed to be able to spend megabucks on big name players as well as get a new stadium on the way!  This would obviously require far more money than LFC had or David Moores could provide.  The writing was on the wall, it was time for Moores to move on, sell up and move on.

 

At the time, Rick Parry and David Moores had been looking for possible investor's/buyers for a fair bit of time, these included the likes of Thaksin Shinawatra and Robert Kraft.  Both of which were met by Rick Parry, both of which failed to come through, for what reasons I do not know.

 

Anyways, some time later, DIC (Dubai International Capital, the internation investment arm of Dubai Holdings) where confirmed as being in exclusive negotations with Liverpool FC (3rd December 2006) with a view to a takeover.  All this even got to the point whereby DIC started the process of due diligence (hope I got the terminology correct).

 

Then, it was revealed that DIC pulled out after trying to make the then Liverpool FC board make a decision whilst they were also considering an offer from George Gillett and Tom Hicks.

 

This brings up an immediate question, how can you consider an option from one party when you have announced that you are in exclusive negotiations with the original party?  I just do not get that.  Mind you, this is football, a game which no longer makes sense when it comes down to contracts and money (lets face it, footballers lead very privelleged lives, receive a lot of money (well, the ones in top flight leagues at least) for something that a lot of people find joy out of and do as a hobby), contracts in reality mean next to nothing, and the money involved in football now is ridiculous, but then again, it is classed as entertainment.

 

In the end, it was George Gillett and Tom Hicks who bought LFC which gets me onto the next point.  At the time, and from what I read, both George Gillett and Tom Hicks promised not only David Moores but the fans (us) that they would not saddle the club with debt.

 

However, for one reason or another, this came out to not be true.  Oh, it was at first, but they needed to refinance the original loan, which meant getting another loan, this one being secured against the club!  This is a very simplistic outline of what happened, and could very well be wrong, I am doing this from memory.

 

Whether the credit crisis in America has had some sort of major impact on this or not is anybodies guess, but the fact remains, they promised no debt on the club, now thats what we are up to our eye balls in, debt.  And it hasn't stopped there.  They haven't even got the loan to actually pay for the stadium, yet.

 

Oh, the stadium, yes, what a joy that was.  Tom and George commissioned a re-design of the stadium.  The new-new stadium looked incredible, like nothing done before that I have seen, certainly in the football world at least.  Now, I cannot quite remember, and haven't really got the time to do the digging, but the credit crunch really kicked in and along with the rising cost of the stadium, they had to scale back the new-new stadium and get it re-designed, again!  So then we get the new-new-new stadium and by this time people in the football world must already be laughing at us.

 

Now, to be honest and brutally fair, the new-new-new stadium doesn't look half bad.  It really is just a scaled down version of the new-new stadium.

 

It also appears, now, as if Tom and George (pity his name isn't Jerry instead of George, then we would have been run by Tom & Jerry, at least we would have known where we stand, at least ) haven't got the money to properly run the club at all.  They are at logger heads with each other, George is willing to sell to DIC, but Hicks says he will block this!  And, apparently he has the power to do so.  Whether that is legally binding is anyones guess.

 

I haven't even started on the Klinnsman affair, the period for which I blame our slump in form on.  Not only had the pair of them talked to Klinnsman (which it now seems Rick Parry was involved in), they had also given Klinnsman access to Rafa's spending plans on players this summer, seemingly asking him his opinion!

 

Not exactly a gracious period in the ownership for them is it?

 

Hang on a minute though, it doesn't stop there.  You see, at first it seemed like it was Hicks who wanted Klinnsman, as he was the one who told the public (well, confirmed it at least), whilst George Gillett kept his mouth well and truely shut.  This was also the point, apparently, whereby the relationship between the two really did take a turn for the worst.

 

Now we have the latest saga, Tom Hicks requesting that Rick Parry resigns.  On the face of what happened, sympathy for Parry, but the more you think about it the more things start to come together and makes me question not only who I think is the villain but also my own sanity (which brings me nicely to Lost, that does the same thing to me, thanks JJ).  Tom then insists that he did this because he believes that Rick Parry is just not up to the job.

 

Is this true?  Is he not up to the job?  Is it partily because Rafa was moaning about the speed with which transfer dealings were done?

 

You see, if George Gillett had indeed initiated talks with Klinnsman with a view to him taking over and Parry has sided with him, then considering Parry's past with Rafa (who, it is reported and alleged, does not rate Parry), does this mean it was Gillett and Parry who wanted Rafa out?  Now it seems Hicks is starting to side with Rafa.

 

On the face of it, Rick Parry seems to only want the best for the club, his posturing on Sky seemed to show that, and his annoyance at what happened.  However, as I said above, is it all a plot with George to get rid of Rafa?

 

I know who I would prefer to stay and who I would prefer to bu**er off if it came down to it.

 

Was George Gillett keeping his mouth shut purely so Hicks would take the blame for the whole incident?  I am not sure, I am only a fan and know only what I read in various forums/press articles then make my own conclusions for which I can only apologise in advance if they are wrong or way off the mark.

 

Its all very odd, and does not serve well for the club.  We are at a pivitol time of the season, not only with the CL Semi Final looming large, but with the all important 4th place up for grabs, the last thing we need is to look like a laughing stock, again!

 

As I said, JJ Abrams could not have written a better script, wonder who Jessica Lucas could play though, lol?  Again, let me apologise in advance if I have got anything wrong or incorrect.  This is purely a fans view and a lot of what I have said is done from memory.

I have a massive list of films which I am very much looking forward to, were can I start?  Hmmmm.......

 

Amusement - I am looking forward to this horror flick, partily because it looks good, but mainly because it has Jessica Lucas in it.  Come on, I have managed not to mention her for a good few posts, give me some credit..... ah, Jessica Lucas..... and bump, back to Planet Earth.  Did I mention that I think she is one of the prettiest women I have seen?  Once or twice.

 

Oh, the film itself.  Well, the plot outline is this, three women are stalked by a killer who has a grudge against them from childhood.  Thats it.  It seems like it's going to be one of those teen-type horror flicks like Scream, but I love those sort of films.  Plus, it has Jessica Lucas in it (did I mention that already?), maybe, can't remember.

 

I was going to bump the profile I did of her up to the top of the blog as it has fallen off the bottom into the archives, but I don't feel I did her justice so will re-write it from scratch.

 

EDIT:  The release date, I believe, has been put back, to 12th September 2008 here in the UK!!!!  WHAT!?!?!?  I have to wait that long for my next Jessica fix!?!?!?  It was meant to be released in April!  How cruel!  How so very cruel!  I demand to speak to the management!  This is just not on!  However, if they decide to have the UK premier in Liverpool with all the stars coming and me invited as a VIP guest with back stage pass, I may just forgive them!  However, I may only be speaking to one person all night, don't say I didn't warn you!

 

 

 

You see, Sam was slated for Spiderman 3, but, me personally, I thought it was a good film.

 

The basics of it is, an unsuspecting woman (played by Alison Lohman) gets a supernatural curse cast upon her.  Two things:

 

If Justin Long can be in this, why can't I - LOL?  Just kidding.

 

And yes, one of the main reasons I am looking forward to this may be the small matter of Jessica Lucas being cast in it as well. 

 

As I said, why not me?  Possibly because of the small matter of me not being an actor.

 

 

 

 

I would even be looking forward to the 9th season of CSI if Miss Lucas was guaranteed to be reprising her role as Ronnie Lake in it, and that says something (I must be one of the very few people who feel indifferent about the series).

 

Well, now on to other films which I am looking forward to, unfortunately none of them star Jessica.......

 

Terminator 4 - WOW, they are making another Terminator, and in a stroke of genius cast the brilliant Christian Bale as John Connor!  Now, in my eyes, Christian Bale was the one who brought Batman back to life after George Clooney killed him!  (I believe in a stroke of humour, something which Mr Clooney seems to have in abundance, he himself said something along the lines of "You know, out of all the villians who tried to kill Batman, I was the one who managed it", I am not sure of the quote, or even if its true, but I could not agree more TBH, sorry George).

 

Anyways, I digress (really must stop doing that).  I think Mr Bale is a marvellous actor who really does go that extra mile for his part.  Just watch the difference in him for The Machinist and Batman.  From one extreme to another.  Plus, the guy is English!  Hang on a minute!  Do we see a buck in the trend?  An Englishman being cast as a good guy in different film genres?  In Hollywood?  How is that possible?  How?  How?  How?  It just does not happen!  It does, however, make a refreshing change.

 

 

Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull - Please, don't tell my sister I am looking forward to seeing this, she may decide that she doesn't have to fulfil her part of the bargain.  You see, I go to see Indy with my sister, my sister comes with me to watch Amusement.  Simple as.

 

Its Indy, what more is there to be said?  I know I skitted it about how it should have been called "Quest For A Zimmer Frame", but I am a fan of Harrison Ford.  Well, okay, only in Indy and Star Wars, but thats enough.

 

I am also a fan of Indiana Jones as well.  Unfortunately, I do not know much, well, anything about the plot, but would imagine whips and hats make an appearance, probably some good guys/girls and bad guys/girls.  Will also probably involve running around a bit, some gun fighting and car chases.  Their you go I made the plot up completely off the top of my head and probably got it spot on!

 

 

Batman: The Dark Knight - Its Batman, it has Christian Bale as Batman, he fights The Joker, what more to be said?

 

A special mention at this point to Heath Ledger, RIP mate, you gave many a people hours of joy.

 

Other films I am looking forward to:

 

The New Hulk

Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay (these two are seriously funny)

 

Their are probably more, but I cannot think of them right now.

 

'Til next time peeps, I am off to see if I can get The Covenant on Blu-Ray (hmmmm... wonder why?  Who stars in it again?)

You know, sometimes, just sometimes, it can be very, very difficult being a Liverpool Fan.  I mean, we really do not make it easy on ourselves, not one bit!  However, our love affair with the Champions League lives on.

 

The first twenty minutes was a bit harrowing, and when Arsenal went one up, I thought (and considering the way Arsenal were playing at the time) they were going to rip us a new one!

 

However, it was not to be.  Sami Hyypia equalised with what was a tremendous header, and I can really thank Arsene Wenger for playing Senderos.  An Arsenal friend of mine said that he is a liability, and boy is he right!  He allowed Sami to look like a young, quick winger by getting turned with a drop of Sami's shoulder and then bam!  What a header to equalise with!  Get in you beauty!

 

At this point, not only did the Arsenal players allow their heads to drop, but all of a sudden we looked like we have actually seen a football and play the actual game.  From this point forward we had the wind beneath our wings, our tails up, all of a sudden we were up for it!

 

It was exciting stuff, that it was.

 

I could not help thinking though that I really did not want a penalty shoot-out.  Being a life long Liverpool fan, it just happens that over the past few seasons we have had our fair share of them (not least after THAT amazing comeback in Istanbul) and there are only so many times you will win them.

 

Then Fernando Torres!  Oh Fernando Torres!  You know this guy is probably the best striker in England, if not Europe at the moment.  To score almost thirty (29 to be precise) goals in your first season at a new club is astounding!  And boy, what a way to score more goals in a season than Michael Owen had ever done for Liverpool in any single season.

 

Someone once said you can tell a marvellous/great/tremendous/......... (fill in the blank with your prefered superlative) player because when they get the ball, time seems to slow down.

 

I will go one step further and say, when Fernando Torres gets the ball time stands still.  Lets make no bones about it, Kolo Toure and William Gallas are quality defenders, but Torres made them look like school boys.  Toure is partily at fault though, he made a fatal error.  When Torres got the ball, Toure took a step backwards away from Torres.  Thats it, you have in the split second made his mind up for him.  He turns, he shoots.  And like a bullet the ball arrows into the net!  What a beautifully taken goal!

 

Thats it!  No amount of permuatations of scoreline would now allow for a penalty shoot-out!

 

Even at this point, though I could not help but think we really do need another goal, and boy do I hate being right sometimes.  Arsene Wenger changed things by bringing on the very speedy Theo Walcott.  Aurelio should have just took the yellow card and brought him down on the half-way line (why didn't he?  Is it wrong for me to think that way?).  However, he didn't, he allowed Walcott to get away, it was around the 80 minute mark as well.  All of a sudden, it was something like six Arsenal players against three of our defenders, vastly outnumbered the inevitable happened, they equalised on the night!

 

That meant that Arsenal would go through on the away-goals rule!

 

Unlike Arsenal, though, we did not let our heads drop, we fought and we fought like gladiators.  The rocket like Babel made a mazy run into the area and managed to get Gallas on the wrong side forcing Gallas to bring him down in the penalty area as Babel would have been clean through (and as we learn later, you cannot allow Babel to do that as he can be lethal).

 

The ref points to the spot, OMG, my heart cannot take this (I am getting goose pimples just thinking about it).  Gerrard takes the ball and plonks it on the spot.  And without any nerves slots home a brilliantly taken penalty!  We are ahead again!

 

What makes the penalty even more remarkable is that, even by his own admission, this was one of Gerrards worst performances in a Liverpool shirt!  Yet, he took that penalty with no nerves.

 

Well, that was around 84 minutes (I think), six minutes plus stoppage time to go!  No!

 

Arsenal poured and poured forward, tired legs on the Arsenal side and ours (the previously taken off Torres looked absolutely knackered).  The back line held fast though, defending like there lives depended upon it.  Yet the tired legs, misplaced passes, tired minds, mistakes happen.

 

Then one brilliant pass, one excellent run from the oh-so-very quick Babel, even with Fabregas trying his best to pull him back, he has gone, then WHAM!  Its in the back of the net!  OMG its 4-2, the game is basically over!

 

Then the final whistle goes!  What a match, what a night.  Another tremendous European night at the home of Englands most successful footballing side, Liverpool.  Anfield sounded like it was rocking!

 

Oh, how we can do with a few more like these, please!

Well, the tie is evenly balanced with a slight advantage to Liverpool having got the all important away goal in the first leg.

 

I am not, however, convinced that that is a good thing.  I mean, what mind set do we go out onto the pitch with?  Do we go for another goal, or do we protect what we have?

 

A very dangerous position to be in!

 

And, to be honest, the last thing I want is for Arsenal to score first and us having to chase the game, that is not something I fancy happening, not one bit.  If there is one time to break that habit of 1-1 draws between the two teams, today is the day!

 

I have faith in Rafa though and the team, I believe they can pull us through this, but will not know for sure until around 10PM tonight at which point I may or my not blog a small match report.

I would just like to apologise to those who I had spoilt Coronation Street for by telling you, yesterday, that David Platt was going to be put behind bars.  It's just what I read.  Sorry.

 

Ever heard of the word flipped?  Look at the next edition of the dictionary and it will just say see David Platt.  The lad lost it, I mean totally lost it.  I mean, right in front of everyone he goes on a windows smashing rampage!

 

He smashed car windows and house windows, and the majority of people just stood there and watched him do it.  Now I am not one to criticise (oi, you at the back, stop sniggering), but come on writers!  Absolutely no way would absolutely no one have done anything about David's little spat (understatements of the year r us), if I saw someone smashing car windows (which also happened to be mine), then the fella would be wearing his weapon of choice out of his backside!

 

No, the Coronation Street writers decided to turn the entire cast into quivering idiots who just stood there and let it happen..... "Thats my house", shouted one "poor" owner of a house that became victim to David's little spat, "Well, do something about it", I shouted at the TV, I won't go into what else I said in anymore detail but needless to say it ended with the word head!

 

Sometimes, you must, you really must, wonder exactly what is going through the writers mind at the time, I just cannot believe that absolutely no one would have done something.

 

One character just went around screaming, "Someone, call the police", for half of the episode and inbetween times screamed "Where are the police?"  Sorry for telling you this, hon, but they are out buying donoughts or catching some pesky motorist who is doing 1mph above the speedlimit.  Or, indeed, doing nothing because they are so scarred of the all the paperwork afterwards, you know, with questions like, "Did you treat offender (nee, victim of society) with kindness?"  answer: "Yes, gave him a donought", "asked if his/her handcuffs are too tight".

 

Oh my God, I am going off on one again, tandgents that is!  There I go again.... I wonder what could bring my mind back..... hmmmm....... ah yes, a certain female celeb.

 

You know, I started to have a go yesterday about the Barlow's?  Well, good old Ken, probably one of the most boring characters to be adorning our wonderful TV (some of which is real...... OMG, Reality TV Shows *cracks knuckles* let me at it..... not yet), at least out of all of them he had the guts and taunacity to go up to David Platt (whom, it must be said, at this point was sitting in a door way very close to just rocking back and forth) and try to talk him down.

 

What did poor Ken get for his trouble?  Shoved in the chest and a very sore knee.  Did anybody at this point try to stop David Platt?  Nope.  It wasn't until he had a go at the kebab shop that the owner grabbed him and just when he was about to kick seven tonnes of crap out of him, the police rolled up.  Wow, just in time!

 

What did Gail (David's mother) do?  Cried, sobbed and said "be careful" or something along those lines.  Now I am as understanding as the next person, but please, he pushed you down the stairs, you have watched him go on a rampage of wanton destruction and you are telling him to be careful?

 

Not only that, but she basically called her own daughter a liar because she dared to speak against David (yes, the same angelic David).  David who was for always trying to do other things to wreck her life as well, although it was funny when she got her own back.

 

Not only all this, but he almost killed Gail's granddaughter, he tried to kill himself (when all he was trying to do was wreck his sisters wedding) and various other things.

 

Gail's mother read my mind though, "and throw away the key".  The difference is, she was talking about David, I was talking about the writers.

 

I still think Janine (EastEnders) would kick the daylights out him though, he is evil, but she is Devil Spawn (said in my best Vincent Price voice).

 

You do know though that the only way he will ever get killed off is by death by marriage to Sally/Leah from Home And Away, although this would have to wait until after the sordid little affair to kill Bianca off first.  And then, I really do think to rid ourselves of David Platt would take a bit of bigomy and get him married to both Sally and Leah.  That may just do it, he does, after all, seem to be able to always come up smelling of roses.

 

Gosh, maybe we could go one step further, and get him married to Sally, Leah and Janine.  Janine could kill him, Sally could come back from the dead and Leah could just, well, lets just say accidents do happen.  That would surely do it?

 

Hey, maybe, just maybe, I could get in touch with JJ Abrams and ask him to send him to the Lost island afterwards (in between me asking JJ Abrams to introduce me to Jessica Lucas, of course)?

 

Oh, and one more thing, the Barlow's have escaped my wrath again, but there will be a next time, oh yes, of that you can be sure.

 

Actually, no, they haven't, the Barlow's?  Yawn****, oh excuse me, the Barlow's, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, oh gosh I just seem to fall asleep everytime I mention the Bar.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

 

 

Hope you enjoyed this edition of Soapwatch.

 

Later peeps.

I am sitting here thinking, what is on TV tonight?  Really what is?

 

And I think, in all honesty, nothing, nadda, feck all.  I mean, is CSI season 8 certain episodes which contain a certain actress I may have mentioned once or twice in one or two previous blog entries on?  No.  Is The Covenant on (which also just happens to also star Jessica Lucas  - I knew it, couldn't go more than a few blogs without mentioning her, again)?  No.

 

Is there any Premiership football on?  Hmmmm..... searches through Internet...... hang on...... nope, Sky have Stoke City Vs Crystal Palace and Setanta (or sultana if you prefer ) have Aberdeen vs Falkirk!  Wow, can't wait.......

 

Hmmmm, Coronation Street is on tonight, which has avoided my wrath up until now, but it's only survived by the skin of it's teeth by the fact that David Platt has been put behind bars!  Someone please throw away the key!

 

Oh, yes, David Platt (hang on, I promised myself I would not rip into Coronation Street, just yet..... hang on, can't do it, got to restrain myself..... oh, sod it, it's only David Platt, at the moment).  What a bleedin' Sociopath he is?

 

I mean, who would drive themselves into a river JUST to spoil someone's (in this case his sister's) wedding?  Well, David Platt did!

 

Who would hide drugs (illegal) in a little girl's doll, only for little girl to find them, eat one and come close to death?  Well, again, David Platt did!  What happened to Martin Platt, the one and only nurse who know's everything and can do anything (poor fello: help, my leg has fallen off.... Martin:  No worries, I will have it sewn back on in ten minutes with no scarring and you will be walking again in thirty minutes)?  He would have had the little girl up and running in no time at all!

 

Woah, slow down fella, getting off course a bit here......

 

I will leave the Barlow's alone until I decide it is time...... No, shouldn't have mentioned the Barlow's!

 

Jessica Lucas, Jessica Lucas, Jessica Lucas  (off Cloverfield)..... and now I am calm again.

 

Ah right, David Platt!  One question that immediately springs to mind is this, is he related in anyway, shape or form to Janine?  Do the TV awards now give awards for best played/most evil character?

 

Who would win?

 

Well, neither, my guess is Sally and Leah of Home And Away have seen off more people.  Even though they are not actually evil, they should win it by default.

 

Oh yes, back to tonight's TV, well, let's see.... their is Emmerdale Farm (didn't that get blown up?).

 

Hang on a minute, Eurosport2 UK is showing Champions League Handball, I thought Maradona had retired?  Their is also Delia on BBC2, however, everytime I think of Delia, I cannot get her screaming at me "Come on, let's be having you" out of my mind!   Now that is a scary thought, oh no, images..... Jessica Lucas, Jessica Lucas..... thats better, they have gone away now.

 

Oooh, a re-run of Top Gear on Dave (WhereTF did that name come from?  I mean, why?), only problem (close your eyes Vauxhall lovers) it has a review of a Vauxhall in it!

 

And we have a re-run of a Dr Who episode, which brings me nicely linked, to Saturday's Dr Who.  Well, I love Dr Who, always have, it's brilliant.... well, on the whole at least until the weekend it was.  Someone said to me "Did you watch that abomination?", I am not going to be that harsh on it, however;

 

(Queue Victor Meldrew rant/complaining), how much of my licence fee went on paying for the special effects of some weird looking blobs of fat walking around the street's of England?  A 5-year-old could have done better SFX than that!  Come on Auntie Beeb, if you are gonna do something with SFX, especially using licence payers money, please make it look like something decent!  Oh well, at least we got a glimpse of Billie Piper!

 

And everytime I caught a glimpse of Catherine Tate I just felt like saying "Am I bovered?"

 

All I can say at this time about Dr Who and that episode is, for me, well below par!

 

Hang on a minute!!!!  What's this?  Disaster!  That's what!  A Battlestar Galactica Special tomorrow night on Sky One, but it clashes with the Football (for those who don't know, and why, it is Liverpool Versus Arsenal - CL QF 2nd Leg), oh phew, I have Sky Plus.  Thats sorted then!

 

See ya again soon peeps.

I eventually made it to the place I was meeting my mates in, for some reason it took me longer than usual to get ready, which was odd since I was really looking forward to the whole schebang.  Luckily, I wasn't late, I made it on time, usually though I am the first one to arrive.

 

The first thing I can say is this, NEVER AGAIN!  Never again am I going to arrange a night out for Ladies Day night, what a nightmare.  We started off in our usual meeting place, only to find it seemed to be housing half of Liverpool's population.

 

Now, this particular bar we all really like, but not that night.

 

The bar itself?  Oh the bar, I swear at one point some people were standing on others to get to the bar!  It took on average 20 mins to get served.  I mean it was crazy.  We spent the time taking bets on who would be the next person to run off to the toilet to, erm, "blow chunks".  When are they gonna do self service?  LOL

 

One fella spent almost 30 minutes asking people were the toilet was, everyone told him the correct place, but could he comprehend anything?  Nope is the resounding answer.  You see what drinking all day does to ones self?

 

For an idea of just how busy it was, get yourself a tin of sardines and then try to squeeze a sledgehammer into it.

 

We did have a laugh though, mainly buzzing off of the peeps who decided it would be a good idea to drink all day and then attempting to stagger through said tin of sardines.

 

Liverpool was packed!  I mean packed!

 

We did go to other places, but they were all the same, packed to the rafters.

 

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind busy places, busy places are cool and good for a laugh, but last night was a whole new level of busy.

 

Lots of police out last night as well, lots and lots of them.

 

Shame about the number of taxi's.  Oh the "hunt the taxi game".  We decided at 1:30AM to call it a night, although I wanted to stay and do an all-nighter, well, lets say I didn't get home until past 3AM!  And it was freezing, I didn't take a coat or jacket or anything like that.

 

One hour and fifteen minutes to find a taxi!  One hour and fifteen minutes!

 

And I must be one of the very few people out last night who doesn't/didn't have a hangover this morning!  LOL

Another 1-1 draw between Arsenal and Liverpool, third game between the two sides, third 1-1 draw.

 

A very well taken goal by Peter Crouch, who enjoyed one of his few starts of the season, to put the Mighty Reds ahead, only for The Gunners to equalise later on.

 

I just hope Tuesday's result is more favourable for the Red Men.

 

Later peeps.

Right, again, I had to do it.  The return of certain members of the cast, nothing like a good funeral to bring back some old cast members (in this case Frank Butchers second, yes, second funeral.  He faked his death first time around, seriously, who can make this up?  Obviously someone out there, the odd, odd people.).

 

We have:

 

Bianca - Oh please someone, spare me, it's just too much, and I have only just started.  Did the writers of EastEnders just go out of their way to create, possibly the most irritating person around?  Will someone please turn Sally/Leah into a lesbian (come on, give me some artistic license, please), send Bianca to Summer Bay, get her married (not sure if death by civil partnership to Sally/Leah would work quite like marriage (see the Home And Away blog lower down), would anyone know?) to one of them just to get rid of her.  Please?

 

Having said that I can see a two way battle between God and Lucifer:

 

God:  You have her

 

Lucifer:  No, you

 

God:  No, you are having her!

 

Lucifer:  Look, I don't want her, you don't want her, what shall we do?

 

God (rubbing chin):  Hmmmm?....... I know, let's send her back, we can balance the books by getting.......

 

 

*Brings me nicely onto........*

 

Rickaaaaaaay - Oh perlease.  The onslaught is merciless, it really is, not as irritating as his ex above, but enough to make you want to bite your own wrists out.  Poor guy seems to be getting hastle from his (I suppose) girlfriend "Wheres my drink?", "Sit next to me, NOW!", "What are you doing talking to anyone" or "Suck my toes in front of every one, biatch".  At least he is a reasonably nice guy, unlike his sister.......

 

 

God:  Oh I forgot to ask, how is your daughter these days, Lucifer?

 

Lucifer (shakes head in worry):  She has disappeared.

 

 

*** No she fecking hasn't, she has returned to EastEnders..... and brings me onto.....

 

Janine - The daughter from hell.  Devil spawn, call her what you like, she makes, well, pretty much anyone look normal.  Manipulative nutter by day, erm, manipulative nutter by night.  Not entirely sure what she is meant to be.  Psychopath?  Sociopath?  Pathological Liar?

 

Try ALL, and then some.  This girl has some serious issues.  All, on the whole, for money.

 

She has murdered one husband though, so would go well in Home And Away.  At least with Janine you don't have to wait for the husband/boyfriend to die of natural causes/convenient accident/balancing the books, she will just kill him anyways.  Hey, if you are really lucky, she could get married, kill that husband in a "convenient accident", and get married to someone else, all in the same day.  Gives a whole new meaning to shotgun wedding (well, depends on her weapon of choice).

 

I remember that wedding, she got married to the poor guy, ah yes Barry, thats him.  Then they went for a "convenient" walk to a "convenient" cliff (ish), where he poured his heart out to her about how he felt, at which point she broke his heart by telling him she bascially hated him, and then pushed him over the edge, literally.  She left him there to die, oh yes, he was still alive after hitting the ground, but she left him there.

 

Blimey, JJ Abrams couldn't write this (and then gets very pretty people to play the characters like Jessica Lucas  (I knew it, I just knew I couldn't go more than two or three blogs without mentioning her, did I say how pretty I think she is?))

 

She has only just got back and has attempted to ransack Pat's kitchen looking for a letter that never existed........

 

 

Diane - Well, the least irritating of the returnies and at least you don't feel like your eyes want to crawl out and hide behind the sofa when you see her.

 

Her first job (well, obviously apart from being at the funeral), was to tell a very worried Ian Beal (whom I have always liked, the guy who plays him is a Liverpool Fan) to basically sod off and then says to Peggy Mitchell that he basically came onto her.  Then she discovers he is very worried about, how would you say this, his extremely disfunctional daughter.

 

Woah, a replacement for Janine?  Possibly, except she is far less subtle about it all.  But, she does have age on her side, their is still time.

 

I need to go and watch some Jessica Lucas movies now, I am depressed, that will cheer me up a bit.

 

 

Hope you enjoyed this edition of Soap Watch.

Thats right peeps, I am going out with the lads tonight!  We are going into Liverpool for a few pints, just a few mind , don't want to get too drunk.

 

Oh yes, tonight could be even more interesting, as it is Ladies Day!

 

For those who don't know, this weekend is Grand National weekend at Aintree (horse racing) and on the Friday they have what's called a Ladies Day.  I am sure, though, that it is just a conspiracy to get lots of ladies to buy lots of hats.

 

Anyways, this also means that Liverpool City Centre will be packed tonight.

 

And, honestly, this was by no-means planned, I had no idea (believe it or not, or was it it just didn't register?) that it was ladies day until Tuesday when one of my mates rang me and said, "Great planning, it's ladies day on Friday."

 

It wasn't planned, honest.  I wonder if any famous people will be out tonight?  Yippee, one of my favourite games, spot the celeb.

 

Well, I may still blog tonight when I get home, but the entry may look like something out of the World of nonsense, or I may blog about it in the morning, if I can remember anything.  Having said that, I am not, and never have been, in that much of a state.  LOL

 

Later folks.  Remember, keep it real!

Let me start todays blogging by saying well done to the Red Men.  Not the perfect result (that would have been, ooh, I don't know, 6-0 to Liverpool?), nor the perfect performance, however a 1-1 draw away from home in the Champions League is a half decent result.

 

We did have one thing on our side last night though, and for a change, lady luck!  Dirk Kuyt could have so easily given away a penalty.

 

Gerrard and Torres both didn't play to their best last night, and if I am totally and brutally honest, our defence needed to be, but that's what happens when you go away from home and get the all important away goal.  The other team are bound to try to pummel you.

 

Anyways, to be brutally honest with you, football is a results game, as I said to one of my mates, I don't care if Arsenal had 40 shots on target, it's the end result that matters.

 

Now what we need is another one of those special European nights at Anfield!!!!

Well, the game kicks off in 70-80 minutes, and I can tell you I am not looking forward to it one bit!

 

I just hope Torres and Gerrard are playing to the top of their game, they will need to, as indeed, will the rest of the team.

 

COME ON YOU RED MEN!!!!!!!!!

 

 

As sad as it may seem, I do sometimes watch Home & Away,  that is a different story though.

 

Anyways, I have noticed a few things about Home & Away, and one thing that is glaringly obvious is this; if the actor happens to be male and want to get away from acting in Home & Away, get the writers to write your character as either:

 

A - Have a long term relationship

 

or

 

B - Get married to

 

either of the characters Sally or Leah, as soon as that happens, it is almost guaranteed that the actors character will be written out of the show, which also normally involves the actors character funeral!

 

You know, sometimes I am sure these soaps have a competition to see who can be the most depressing!  Sometimes Home And Away makes even EastEnders look like a light-hearted comedy (don't, please, get me started on the return of Ricky, Bianca or the daughter from hell, Janine, for, oh my another, the funeral of Frank Butcher.  And no we were not spared the image of him in his spinning and flashing tie in a flash back by Pat, it really was almost enough to make me want to either vomit or slash my wrists, or, indeed, both and not necessarily in that order).

 

I cannot imagine any town/city have as much trouble and strife as Summer Bay (OMG, I know the name of the town in Home & Away).... That does it, I am going to have to go home and watch The Covenant again and cheer myself up by the sight of Jessica Lucas (, I would say of Cloverfield, but considering the link I would hope you get the idea), ah.... can't wait for Cloverfield to come out on Blu-Ray, Jessica Lucas in Hi-Def.......

 

You know, Christmas time is amazing if you watch these soaps!  You have to ask yourself, how depressed do I fancy being today?  The choice is phenomenal, Coronation Street (always good for a crisis over Christmas), EastEnders (always good for a crisis full-stop), Home And Away (never good for the manic depressive, it might just be enough to tip the balance).

 

Home And Away, even when it's a happy story line for instance a marriage between Any Male Character and Leah/Sally, you know something bad is just waiting around the corner, and in this example, you can see the Grim Reaper just hanging over the male character even in the Church/Registry Office/Outside just waiting for the ceremony to finish, at which point you see him sharpening his sythe with a smile on his face.

 

And now, of course, we have been "blessed" with the fact that Sally's return from the almost dead (How could they kill her off?  How else would the writers rid themselves of a pesky male character?) after having a vision now means that her return has caused the death of Dan (the not so un-suspecting victim of death by marriage to Leah) due to having to balance the books so-to-speak.

 

Hang on a minute.  The writers have got another way of killing off male character, by someone attempting to kill Sally (and why not Leah?)?  Who then comes very close to death, only to have a vision, then when she chooses to come back, the books have to be balanced?  So, now they don't even have to write a happy thing like a wedding to kill off a male character.  But hang-on, the character really doesn't have to be male now?  Nope, it can be anyone..... hmmmm.

 

The poor male actor though, imagine it, unsuspectingly they have incurred the wrath of the writer(s), is enjoying his time acting in Home & Away, comes in one day to read the script, and reads that he is getting married to Sally/Leah, his heart sinks, he knows the writing is on the wall.........

 

Anyways, I'm off to find out when I might be able to watch Jessica Lucas () in Hi-Def in Cloverfield.